This is one man’s veiw of  being a father for the first time:

At last, he’s arrived. For nine months we’ve been waiting and worrying. Planning and hoping. The time seemed to drag on forever. How much longer would we have to wait? Suddenly she went into labour and it was panic stations. Drop everything; get to the hospital, everything moving in a blur. More delays, delivery lasts eighteen hours, she must be exhausted, I know I am!

First things first, I need to check him out. Twenty fingers, twenty toes, everything seems to be there, in the right place and moving in the right way. That’s what we didn’t talk about. Probably we didn’t want to tempt fate by admitting our fears. Big sigh of relief. OK, she’s resting now so I can get on to the practical things. Phone both sets of parents first. Then the other close relatives and lastly the close friends we promised to ring straightaway.

Been home two weeks now, forgotten what sleep is, but he is worth it. They say he can’t smile at this age it is just wind. Rubbish! When I first saw him this morning I swear he smiled at me. I have done a lot of thinking since he arrived. Realised I can’t put myself first anymore. There is now someone who is totally dependent on me. They come first. Surprisingly I want to put them first. Maybe I am growing up at last!

Hey, you know I had something to do with this. I know he is gorgeous, I told you that but you might at least acknowledge me when you all come in the room. Just discovered I am jealous of a three-week-old baby. I seem to have become invisible in the last three weeks. Maybe I am not growing up at last.

A month old now and we are all getting settled into a routine. I have realised that she has all the same feelings I have but at least she seems to get some sympathy when visitors call. Still being ignored in the main but don’t care anymore, just happy to hold my son and cuddle him (and hold his mum and cuddle her – when time and tiredness permit). Suddenly realise I am happy. Just discover I haven’t thought about putting myself first for at least a week. Maybe I am growing up at last!

Marriage is an intimate relationship of two people which keeps them connected together.

Starting and breaking up the marital relationship is quite easy, but it is difficult to keep the relationships alive and keep the marriage intact.

When you feel that your marriage is in danger, you should take the efforts to save your marriage.

However, it is not a one-way traffic; both the partners should equally strive to maintain the healthy relationships.

As separation or divorce can affect personal, economical and social stability, both the partners equally need to improve themselves and save the marriage.

Today, you will find numerous men trying to save their marriage.

Fortunately there are many tools and places of support that you can go to get help with your marriage.

The first thing you should do is to try and identify where your problems are.

What is causing the problems and why?

Is it you feeling like your needs are not being met, or is your wife who feels her needs are not being met and you cannot understand why?

In order to begin helping your relationship you must try and communicate with your partner.

Most marital problems can be sorted out by simple communication.

Sometimes however this is where the problems are, and if your marriage has come to the point where the two of you are not able to talk then maybe it is time to get some external help.

Here are some very quick tips for men trying to save a marriage:

1. Talk, talk and talk some more!!! Do not close down and refcuse communication.

2. Do not be afraid to show your feelings. If you are hurt or upset, show it! Men can be emotional and still be “men”.

3. Write down any feelings, worries or gripes down. That way when you talk your thoughts are organised and you won’t start rambling and get frustrated.

4. Try to be as calm as possible. Nothing will ever get sorted out while you are screaming at eachother.

5. Do not be afraid to get help. If you are having real problems do not feel weak because you look for help or guidance.

6. Do not give up! Most relationships can be saved if you take the time and effort together.

7. Remember to appriciate how lucky your are to have someone in your life that wants to be married to you, and take the time to think about the good times you share together as much as you can.

This can help balance any negative feelings you are having and can help break a negative thought pattern.

Remember if you need any help saving your marriage then make sure to read our marriage help page.

Communicating with our children can be a difficult task at times. We feel like they’re not listening to us; they feel like we’re not listening to them. Good listening and communications skills are essential to successful parenting. Your child’s feelings, views and opinions have worth, and you should make sure you take the time to sit down and listen openly and discuss them honestly.

It seems to be a natural tendency to react rather than to respond. We pass judgment based on our own feelings and experiences. However, responding means being receptive to our child’s feelings and emotions and allowing them to express themselves openly and honestly without fear of repercussion from us.

By reacting, we send our child the message that their feelings and opinions are invalid.

But by responding and asking questions about why the child feels that way, it opens a dialog that allows them to discuss their feelings further, and allows you a better understanding of where they’re coming from.

It’s crucial in these situations to give your child your full and undivided attention. Put down your newspaper, stop doing dishes, or turn off the television so you can hear the full situation and make eye contact with your child. Keep calm, be inquisitive, and afterwards offer potential solutions to the problem.

Don’t discourage your child from feeling upset, angry, or frustrated. Our initial instinct may be to say or do something to steer our child away from it, but this can be a detrimental tactic. Again, listen to your child, ask questions to find out why they are feeling that way, and then offer potential solutions to alleviate the bad feeling.

Just as we do, our children have feelings and experience difficult situations. By actively listening and participating with our child as they talk about it, it demonstrates to them that we do care, we want to help and we have similar experiences of our own that they can draw from. Remember, respond – don’t react.